Your Job as a Role Model – Kids
Your Job as a Role Model
Anthony Kane, MD
A certain educator was once asked at what point should a parent begin to prepare for child raising.
"How old are you" the educator inquired.
"Twenty-three."
"You should begin twenty-three years ago."
What is the message The single most important thing a parent can do to educate a child is to provide the child with a good role model. A parent has to work a whole lifetime becoming the type of person that he wants his child to become.
The most important people in the world in the childs eyes are his parents. They are his first and most important teachers. The behavior of a childs parents leaves a permanent impression in the childs subconscious mind. Why is this so The reason is that the most reliable source of priorities and values in a childs eyes is his parents. Children have an innate trust in their parents. They feel that everything their parents say and do is the true and proper way to behave.
We all wish our children would do what we say and not what we do. However, this is not how the mind of a child works. The intellect of a child is undeveloped. As a result, children function an emotional level, absorbing more from what they see and hear around them than from what they are taught.
What is the take home message The main thing for you to realize is that you have far more influence on your child than you probably realize. Your child is going to pattern himself after you. That is how nature set it up. Your job as a parent is to be the best role model that you can be. True, it is hard, but that is the way it is.
The following is a story I heard recently that brings out the extent to which your child learns from your actions.
A certain kindergarten teacher once warned a group of parents to be careful how they behave in front of their children.
"By the way your children play in school," she said. "I know which of you treat each other respectfully. I know which of you use foul language at home. I know everything about how you behave in your home by the way your child plays, talks, and behaves."
Remember, you might think that everything that goes on in your home behind closed doors is hidden from the world, but it is not. Your child sees everything. Your child is going to take your behavior and broadcast it to the world. Make sure that what he is transmitting is something that you want the world to see.
Anthony Kane, MD
ADD ADHD Advances
http://addadhdadvances.com
About The Author
Anthony Kane, MD is a physician, an international lecturer, and director of special education. He is the author of a book, numerous articles, and a number of online programs dealing with ADHD addadhdadvances.com/childyoulove.html treatment, ODD, parenting issues addadhdadvances.com/betterbehavior.html, and education. You may visit his website at http://addadhdadvances.com. To sign up for the free ADD ADHD Advances online journal send a blank email to: subscribe@addadhdadvances.comsubject=subscribeartcity
akane@addadhdadvances.com
Bully Victims Need a Healthy Relationship with an Adult – Kids
Bully Victims Need a Healthy Relationship with an Adult
Paula McCoach
"Boys will be boys" and "Girls just do that" is what we hear from so many people. As a kid myself, I remember getting teased and no one came to help or told me what to do. And, you know what It hurt me then as much as it hurts kids today. As a school counselor for 10 years, I have developed and tested various techniques for helping students in dealing with bullying. These programs will help the bullies too!
One of the most effective programs I have developed is a staff to student mentor program. This is a school-based program with the professional staff as mentors to students during the school day. Mentors are teachers, administrators, and guidance counselors. The program takes place in school only and mentors do not transport, visit or meet their mentee outside of the school setting.
Parents are involved through phone calls, notes home and conferences with the mentor/staff member. The effectiveness of this program has been astounding. Students have an opportunity to form a healthy relationship with a professional adult who can assist them on a regular basis and support them in dealing with bullies among other things. Through the confidence and skills the student
Kick Start Your Mentor Program and Stop the Bullies! – Kids
Kick Start Your Mentor Program and Stop the Bullies!
Pau;a McCoach
Whining about bullying and how rotten the bullies were and the poor students that they bullied used to be one of my regular activities. "We have to do something to help these kids" both the bullies and their victims," I would whine. But for years, I just talked to these kids and sent them on their way. After I got sick and tired of being sick and tired of talking about this - I did do something! I started a mentor program for these students!
Behavior referrals, grades, social problems, and poor achievement were our starting criteria for being in the program. Almost every staff member in the building had 2-3 mentees - everyone from the administration, teachers, and counselors to the educational assistants, cafeteria workers and custodians. Over 150 students were in that mentor program which began in 1998.
Each mentor was given a mentor folder with a permission slip, a brochure about the program, a profile sheet, and tips on being a mentor, a pencil and a "Welcome Back to School"card. The profile sheet identified their mentees, homeroom teacher, grade, birthday, and area of concern. Also included in the packet was a birthday card and pencil for the mentor to give their mentees.
Giving gifts was left of to the discretion of the mentor. Some mentees came to expect gifts and the purpose of the mentor relationship was diminished. The kids came to expect them and thought that they were