Its OK for your child to be bored. In fact, its recommended! – Parenting
Its OK for your child to be bored. In fact, its recommended!
Alan M. Hess
NY -- Strange as it may sound, bordom promotes happier, creative kids who are better problem solvers. When children use their own creativity with unstructured play, they find ways to amuse themselves -- even if it means simply daydreaming.
Thats the advice of child development expert, Alan M. Hess who wants to see American children spend more time in unstructured play, less time in structured activities and much less time in front of mindless TV programs. Hess states, "Plain and simple, its called creative child development. I recognize that in our society, its a hard concept for peopke to grasp at first.
"Many American parents who work 60 to 70 hours a week impose a very structured lifestyle on their children. Theyre concerned about boredom, so they overschedule to keep kids busy. Believe it or not, there is a direct relationship between boredom and creative thought."
Alan Hess, president of Safari Ltd., with its line of museum quality creative toys, is a noted authority and respected expert in developing creative play for children. Hess states, "Think back to when you were a kid and you will recall valuable lessons. Left to our own devices we discovered resources we didnt know we had. Im concerned that our busy, well-entertained children may not ever have the chance to learn them."
Hess, states, "Although most of the products that Ive been involved with are designed for children four and up, especially our current Safari line of products, I constantly study toddler trends. Several pediatric physicions, who are part of our research team, have shared some disturbing trends with me regarding middle and upper class parents who push their children to the extremes in the hopes that this will provide a better foundation for the childs future.
"Theyve told me about situations where parents are determined to find the "perfect three year old" pre-school so that their daughter will be prepared for law school later in life. Other parents make their children compete in soccer matches and karate competiton when the child is recovering from the flu. Their misguided reasoning is that the child needs to learn what competition means, regardless of illness, or circumstances. This thinking is insane."
Hess firmly believes that children need time to be children. Creativity, social skills and fun are vital to a well-rounded child. He suggests that parents help children get the most out of unstructured play by limiting TV. Parents might also provide materials, creative toys and even gentle suggestions, if necessary. Parental guidance and parental participation is also important. Hess said, "Bored kids eventually take out the paints, build a dinosaur den, read a book ... and create things, or they come home sweaty from a game of neighborhood soccer. Our educational, nature and science toys with a special focus on scale-model animal and dinosaur replicas are big favorites with children. They love the fantasy play and the fun of creating their own world."
This concept of boredom is new territory at the beginning because children may be upset that they cant watch TV. They may also bicker with their siblings. Hess states, "Working or single parent households may have even more of a challenge, but he strongly encourages parents not to give in and flip on the TV, or let kids watch a video."
The lifelong benefits of unstructured play are so great that Hess urges parents to try to find an hour a week for it. And he offers these tips to make things easier:
Set Limits to TV and Video Play. There is something very wrong with the fact that many children watch an average of 38 hours per week. Cutting back can provide unstructured play time. Most parents and care takers passively allow the media to routinely expose kids to violence and sex when they would never let an individual, or educational institution expose their children to this type of content.
Far too many children spend hours each day at computers, playing with hand-held game devices, or watching videos. Hess suggests that parents set a firm daily limit to these activities. Hess says, "The value of a toy is simple to calculate...to what degree does the toy invite imagination and creativity After a week, if you find that your child is more interested in playing with the toy box instead of the toy, youve wasted money and time."
Unstructured play time doesnt require a huge investment in new toys. Hess cites one focus group study where two boys were playing with toys. One girl had an electronically enhanced dinosaur and she boasted: "My dinosaur can say 500 words!" The other boy, who was holding a Safari dinosaur countered with: "My dino can say anything I want it to say and it looks like a real dino."
Hess states, "We hear so much about hyperactive children who are medicated as a result of this behavior. Is the child really hyperactive, or does the child simply need more unstructured play time Children are free spirits and when thats denied, we see physical and mental manifstations that have a negative impact on a healthy childhood.
"Spend time watching your child play. This can show children that adults value their play," Hess says. Its not necessary to join in, although thats great fun too, as long as parents dont try to take over. In fact, one highly successful parenting strategy involves spending time each day with your child doing whatever he or she chooses to do."
During this "special time," the child makes the decisions, controls the flow of the play and assigns all roles. Its unstructured play time for your child, yet you get to participate. Its important for us to share time with children and it shows them that you value their play.
Hess encourages parents to give this bordom concept a serious try. He states, "Giving your children a break from organized activities and electronic baby-sitters could very well mean sentencing them to boredom, at least at first, but it will open up a whole new world of creativity, fun and adventure as it helps them expand their minds."
www.safariltd.com
About The Author
Alan Hess, president of Safari Ltd., has an extensive marketing background with a wide array of highly successful toy and hobby products. One of the key factors in his success is his understanding of child development research and his ability to apply that knowledge to product development.
Dyslexia: Is the Shoe Perhaps on the Wrong Foot – Parenting
Dyslexia: Is the Shoe Perhaps on the Wrong Foot
Susan du Plessis
Reading is the most important skill that a child must acquire at school, because one must learn to read to be able to read to learn. The implication of this is that the child who is a poor reader will usually also be a poor learner.
Unfortunately poor reading skills, and therefore poor learning skills, have become a reality for an alarming number of people. The $14 million National Adult Literacy Survey of 1993 found that even though most adults in this survey had finished high school, 96% of them could not read, write, and figure well enough to go to college. Even more to the point, 25% were plainly unable to read.
Even more alarming is that reading difficulties are not limited to people who are environmentally, culturally or economically disadvantaged. Many children come from good homes, go to good schools and score average to above average on IQ tests. Yet, they battle to learn to read, and many never succeed.
Children with reading difficulties share a number of common symptoms. They are inclined to reverse letters or words, to omit letters, to lose their place, to remember little of what they have read, or to read with poor comprehension. These children are considered to suffer from a learning disability LD, commonly called dyslexia.
According to the Orton Dyslexia Society at least one in every ten of otherwise able people has serious dyslexia problems. The Foundation of Children with Learning Disabilities states that learning-disabled children represent more than ten million of the total population of the U.S.A. Estimates of learning-disabled students being dyslexic vary between 70 and 80 percent.
FIND THE CAUSE TO FIND A CURE
Most problems can only be solved if one knows what causes the problem. A disease such as scurvy claimed the lives of thousands of seamen during long sea voyages. The disease was cured fairly quickly once the cause was discovered, viz. a Vitamin C deficiency. A viable point of departure in LD research would therefore be to ask the question, “What is the CAUSE of dyslexia”
The idea that dyslexia is a certifiable biological disorder, a physical problem that could be diagnosed and treated accordingly, gained credence during the 1960s and 1970s, giving rise to an armada of theories. One such a theory states that dyslexia is the result when the link between the language, hearing and comprehension centers of the brain is somehow misconfigured during fetal development. Another theory states that dyslexia is caused by “faulty wiring in the brain,” whereas another holds that a subtle impairment of vision may be responsible, while yet another believes that a cerebellar-vestibular dysfunction may be responsible for the learning disability. All these theories – most of them blaming some difference in structure between the brain of the dyslexic and that of the so-called normal reader – have lead to nothing at all. Despite all these theories and all the intervention efforts based on them, not to mention the vast amounts of money expended in the process, the numbers of dyslexics continue to escalate.
Except for the fact that proof of a neurological deficit still eludes the researchers, this theory leaves many questions unanswered. If dyslexia has a neurological basis, why is this supposedly non-contagious “ailment” on the increase Compare the present situation with, for example, that of a century ago. In 1910 the literacy rate in the U.S.A. was so high it was predicted, “the public schools will in a short time practically eliminate illiteracy.” In 1935, a survey of the 375,000 men working in the Civilian Conservation Corps – a government-sponsored work project to provide employment – found an illiteracy rate of 1.9 percent. It is most noteworthy that this last figure was found among men primarily of low socio-economic status. It is even more noteworthy that the illiteracy rates of the first half of the twentieth century reflected, for the most part, people who had never had the advantage of schooling.
It is also impossible to explain how a neurological dysfunction can be more prevalent in specific areas or countries. While the National Commission on Excellence in 1983 warned that the American nation was “at risk,” remedial reading facilities were not needed at all in Japan due to the rarity of reading problems. Some would argue that reading problems were virtually nonexistent in Japan because their written language is easier than our Latin alphabet. That, however, is simply not true. The Japanese Kanji ideograms consist of 1,850 characters. In addition there are two Kana syllabaries,
7 Powerful Ways to Show Love to Children – Parenting
7 Powerful Ways to Show Love to Children
Steve Brunkhorst
Our children are our most important legacy to the world. However, our love is our most important legacy to our children. Here are seven ways to show love that will help children build sturdy foundations for the future.
1. Spend Time with Your Children.
Time is the most loving gift we can give to our children. It allows for the mutual exchange of ideas, emotions, actions, and words that help our children develop and learn to communicate.
Enjoy a toddlers tea parties as well as a teens ball games. Help your children build things and create art. Begin new family traditions that you can enjoy together each year. Ample time spent in mutually enjoyable activities will create memories you will always treasure.
2. Be the Primary Role Model for Your Children.
Children need examples to follow. Teach practical values to your children by modeling those values. Admit when you have made a mistake and apologize. Model being committed to the ideals you embrace. Demonstrate the advantage of integrity over peer pressure.
We teach and influence children more through actions than words. We are our childrens first heroes; the ideals that we live today are the ideals that will influence our children throughout life.
3. Listen to Your Children.
A childs message is one of his or her most essential gifts. We build self-esteem in children when we show interest in what they have to say. Children need to communicate their pride of accomplishment as well as their needs.
Get down at eye level with very young children and listen with your eyes, ears, and heart. Listen most of all to the feelings conveyed through a childs eyes and expressions. If you listen to your children deeply, they will grow up listening deeply to you.
4. Provide Your Children with Loving Discipline.
Children need guidelines and safe boundaries without being constrained unnecessarily. They need to learn the value of being accountable for their choices and actions.
Let your children know that you disapprove of hurtful actions but will always love them as sons and daughters. Loving discipline enables them to recognize the best in other people. It allows children the freedom to explore the world safely and reach their highest potential.
5. Give Your Children Encouragement.
Encouraging words are powerful emotional deposits of confidence and self-esteem. Verbally acknowledge your childrens special talents and accomplishments. Catch your children doing something great, and tell them what a great job they have done.
Children need to know that we recognize and support their hopes and dreams for the future. Encouraging children to grow mentally, emotionally, and spiritually provides the foundation for living a balanced life.
6. Share Your Experiences with Your Children.
We each have valuable stories to tell, unique maps of our journey through life. These stories tell how our reactions to events created the life we are living now. Sharing the benefit of your experiences