The 7 Stages of a Romantic Relationship – Stress Management
The 7 Stages of a Romantic Relationship
Michelle L. Casto, M.Ed.
There are seven stages in a romantic relationship: avoidance, meeting, dating, breaking up, establishing exclusivity, commitment, and keeping the love you find. Each of these stages vary in length and intensity. At each stage, there are thoughts and feelings telling you what to do and when to do it. You need to learn to listen to your intuition in each stage, so that you can make smart decisions.
It is important to note that the breaking up stage can happen at any time within the other stages; i.e., at any time you or the other person decides to exit the relationship for whatever reason.
In all seven stages, you always have these choices:
1. Continue moving forward
2. Stagnate
3. Slow down or go backwards
4. Exit
By taking notice of the signals from your head and heart, you will be better able to interpret what your intuition is telling you. At each stage, consider,
Army Ranger Reveals How to Control Corporate Stress – Stress Management
Army Ranger Reveals How to Control Corporate Stress
Dale Collie
"Adopting the right attitude can convert a negative stress into a positive one." Hans Selye - the "father of stress" and founder of the Canadian Institute of Stress.
Every worker in America has heard of individual stress management techniques -- relaxation, meditation, and visualization -- good tools for getting through stressful periods. But if theyre so great, why do we still have all this stress
Were going to need something more than mood music, aroma therapy, and comfortable lighting to get beyond the stress of todays workplace. Were going to need managements attention because stress control is a leadership responsibility.
The US Army has plenty of experience with stress control as front line leaders strive to keep GIs on the job. Traditionally, the US Army has lost as many soldiers to stress as to enemy gunfire - a ratio of 1:1. The most elite units trim this loss to a ratio of 1:10 - one stress loss for every 10 wounded soldiers.
Regardless of the ratio, every front line soldier is critical to winning the battle. Commanders know that controlling stress under fire is as critical as food, fuel, and ammunition. The same holds true for corporate America. You cant get high productivity with high absenteeism.
Combat leaders watch for stress symptoms and take action. They are taught to "Know your troops, and be alert for any sudden, persistent or progressive change in their behavior that threatens the functioning and safety of your unit." FM 6-22.5, "Combat Stress"
Specifically, front line leaders are taught to help overstressed soldiers in six ways:
Army Step 1. Reassurance
Corporate Solution: Some people need contact with the boss to assure them that things will turn out ok. Spend time to find out workers concerns. Ask for their observations on recent events. Find out what they think about upcoming changes. Ask for their advice -- theyll admire you for demonstrating your trust. Simple remarks showing your confidence in workers can make a big difference.
Army Step 2. Rest and sleep
Corporate Solution: Its worth your while to offer some additional time off if stress is interfering with performance. Consider giving additional breaks to relieve mental and physical fatigue. Improved productivity will more than pay for the unstructured breaks that over-stressed workers will take on their own.
Find out whats needed to help employees get more rest at home. Bring in experts to teach the importance of rest and relaxation. Take a look at that overtime schedule; the extra work might be taking its toll in absenteeism, illness, accidents, and attitudes.
Army Step 3. Food and fluids
Corporate Solutions: You can influence how people eat by getting experts to teach the importance of proper nutrition. Make sure nutritious snacks are available alongside the junk food in vending machines. Provide healthy snacks mid-morning and mid-afternoon when energy levels begin to fade. The investment will pay off in better performance. Reward good health.
Army Step 4. Hygiene - bathing, clean uniforms
Corporate Solution: A scheduled break to get cleaned up before lunch or after a hard day of dirty work can pay off in a big way. Make sure everyone has the right protective clothing for the job. Extreme temperature and dampness create stress that can be easily relieved by proper apparel and hygiene breaks. And, as surprising as it might seem, some employees do not have running water at home.
Not all of them have hot water. Not all of them have washing machines. Make these things available at your workplace or find alternatives. One-time arrangements can go a long way in helping stressed workers get their emotions under control and get their productivity up where it belongs.
Army Step 5. Discussion - A chance to talk about what happened, to tell war stories
Corporate Solution: Everyone benefits from a chance to tell about what went on. Some people are more sensitive than others. There is often great value in routine meetings to kick off the shift or explain the days activities. Scheduling time before or after meetings to talk about what happened can relieve stress for those in the spot light. Team discussions after sales calls can help stressed workers understand the results and focus on what needs to be done.
In times of high stress, some people need to talk about what happened to others around them - family members, community tragedies. Managers can handle the day-to-day conversations and experts are available to address major stressors. Help workers tell their "war stories."
Army Step 6. Restoring identity and confidence with useful work
Corporate Solution: As soon as possible, over stressed workers need to return to their positions of responsibility. They need to see that a they can perform well b that management recognizes their efforts c and that life goes on. Emphasize small accomplishments. Find reasons to reward each person for their achievements.
GIs usually return to their jobs after a short rest, a hot shower, a chat with their supervisor, and a warm meal. Your people can do the same. Most of the time, they can continue in their jobs if you pay attention to their basic needs.
Watch for high stress period in your business cycle and schedule time to work on these six steps. Youll improve productivity and the workplace environment by taking care of your people. Your investment of time and money will be rewarded in better performance and lower costs.
Work with your human resources experts to assist those who are beyond your ability. Let the professionals take care of the severe cases while you take care of your other employees and get the work done.
Can you identify employees who are suffering from stress Do you know what to do about it Evaluate employee problems with an eye toward stress control. Send a blank email to toptenstressors@couragebuilders.com for a f`r`e`e article about the top ten causes of workplace stress.
Copyright 2004 - Dale Collie
You may publish this article electronically or in print f`r`e`e of charge. Just include my full byline and add a hyperlink for web postings. When you publish, please send a courtesy link or email to collie@couragebuilders.com.
About The Author
Dale Collie collie@couragebuilders.com speaker and former US Army Ranger, CEO,and professor at West Point. Selected by "Fast Company" as one of Americas Fast 50 innovative leaders. Author of "Frontline Leadership: From War Room to Boardroom," and "Winning Under Fire: Turn Stress into Success the US Army Way." McGraw- Hil Free newsletter upon request: MailTo:subscribe-956606571@ezinedirector.net
Develop Your Childs Critical Thinking Skills – Stress Management
Develop Your Childs Critical Thinking Skills
Marie Magdala Roker
1. Encourage Questions.
Dont answer every question, instead ask what do they think. Asking questions stimulates conversation between you and your child.
2. Dont Criticize.
Criticism invites low self-esteem. Children feel that they have failed or disappointed their parents when they are criticized. Find alternate ways of correcting the problem. A child will likely shut down communication if they feel that their parents are not supportive.
3. Respect Your Childs Opinions.
Your child is not an extension of you. Although it is difficult to accept at times, it is normal and healthy for your child to have their own opinion. Children who are confident in expressing their opinions are less likely to join gangs or succumb to peer pressure.
4. Teach Your Child To Embrace Diversity.
Encourage your child to learn about different cultures and ethnicities. A well informed child can will understand and respect other peoples values.
5. Teach Your Child To Set Personal Boundaries.
Children need to have their personal space respected in order for them to respect other peoples personal space. Help your child to establish their boundaries and insist that he/she enforce them with their peers.
6. Establish A Nurturing Environment.
Children thrive in environments in which they know they are loved and respected. Remind them every day that you love them and support them.
7. Understand Your Childs Thinking Process.
In order for you to be an advocate for your child in school, you must know and understand how your child learns. Is he/she creative, logical, musical, spatial, interpersonal, intrapersonal, naturalistic Know your childs capabilities and accept their creativity.
8. Let Them Think For Themsleves.
Encourage independent thinking. Let your child decide within reason what is appropriate for them. Give them enough room to make decisions, but also be there in case their plans dont work out.
9. Teach Them Stress Management Skills.
Help your child to effectively deal with stress. Try not to contribute to their stress with demands and unrealistic expectations. Make learning fun!
10. Teach Your Child To Trust His/Her Instincts.
In order for children to be successful in life, they must learn how to trust their decisions. Your child needs to be confident in trusting his/her instincts and feelings. Children who trust themselves are less likely to participate in unhealthy behaviors.
About The Author
Marie Magdala Roker is a Family Coach and Certified Breakthrough Parenting Instructor. She is completing her Masters in Health Education at Columbia Universitys Teachers College. She helps parents to reclaim their lives and students to unlock their academic potential. She is committed to helping build healthy families, one family member at a time.
mroker@livelearnempower.com